When “Single and Independent” Crosses the Line

OK, so we’re single. We have to be independent, right? As one of my friends in her 40s said—it’s not appropriate for us to be living with Mom and Dad just because we’re not married. Those days are long gone.


We’re responsible adults, forced, in many ways, to do everything a man does while still doing what a woman does. We earn a living, keep the house, get the car fixed, pay the bills, do the grocery shopping, make the meals, take out the trash and, if you’re a mom, carry the full weight of child-rearing.


Independent living, however, is different from self-sufficiency. One is responsibility. The other is a mentality: “I can do everything myself, and I certainly don’t need a man to help me.” It’s got an edge to it, whether it’s the pity party because there’s no one, especially a man, to help, or the pride that pushes men away to avoid looking like a “damsel in distress.”


Self-sufficiency isn’t part of God’s plan for us, even if we’re single. God created both men and women to be dependent on one another, married or single. Ultimately, however, He longs for us to be completely dependent on Himself, above all else.


How does godly dependence look different from self-sufficiency in the single woman’s life?



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